Horror Movie Month 2008

As is our tradition, Gloria and I watched a bunch of horror movies this October. Here’s a quick recap:

Saw II-IV were a good watch… well, at least the first two. We saw Saw a few years ago and both agreed it was mediocre. Saw II was better, though, and Saw III was actually a really good capstone to the trilogy. For some reason, though, they decided to keep going. Saw IV was really lousy. I expect that V and VI will be worse, but I’m in no rush to find out.

Opera, like Suspiria, was an incomprehensible and joyless horror film by Dario Argento. I suggest you avoid it.

Chopping Mall was a good old fashioned 80’s horror film by Roger Corman, King of the Bs. It had everything you need: teenagers having sex, robots getting struck by lightning, and an exploding head. Would buy again.

Child’s Play I-III were a disappointment. Each one of the movies had a few amusing bits, but they weren’t very funny, weren’t very scary, and weren’t even all that memorable. I’m looking forward to Bride and Seed of Chucky, though, as they seem like they’ll be a lot of fun. I’m just surprised that they got made. The first three were just lousy.

Dark Water was a movie about a girl who drowns and then terrorizes the living, based on a book by Koji Suzuki. In other words, it sounds a lot like Ring. It had a lot of cool ideas, but basically it stank. It wasn’t very compelling, and the climax made nearly no sense. On the plus side, Dark Water, unlike Ringu, is unlikely to haunt my nights for years to come.

Prom Night was easily the worst of the movies we watched. Its plot was nearly incomprehensible, the construction of the narrative was confusing at best, the writing was awful, Leslie Nielsen and Jamie Lee Curtis were both totaly wasted, and the “payoff” was pointless. How on earth did that get to be a classic?

Mr. Ice Cream Man was mostly a terrible movie, not even on the B list, but the guy who played the ice cream man was creepy enough to get it above Prom Night. Still, what the hell was up with that last scene? It felt completely tacked on.

Basket Case 2 was, in a lot of ways, better than the first. Both were hard to really rate. They’re strange movies. The second one was much more over the top, and I think it was better for it. There’s a scene in which we meet a freak who is mostly a gigantic head, mostly mouth, who sings opera. Awesome!

Black Sheep did not impress. I’m not a big fan of the New Zealand school of horror-comedy. It had a few good gags, but mostly it didn’t entertain me. I think it’s the only movie that Gloria gave up on and went to bed during. I don’t blame her.

Silent Night, Deadly Night was the movie on which we were the most conflicted. I thought it was pretty good, for what it was. Gloria thought that a guy dressed as Santa killing people was just Too Much. Despite that, it’s now probably the most quoted of all the movies we watched this past month. “Punish!” and “Naughty!” just make great lines to yell out randomly.

We might watch one or two more movies that were left over, but I then we may be back to our normal mix of programming until next October. I wonder when we can start Martha on some horror flicks…

Written on November 4, 2008
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